Jersey Shore spin-off coming to Malta
By Karl Stennienibarra and Krista Perugina
The Maltese government has successfully concluded negotiations with MTV to bring their hit reality TV show Jersey Shore to Malta.
The original show documents the escapades of young Italian Americans, or guidos and guidas, with a fondness for hair gel, fake tans, fake jewellery, hair extensions, body building, breast implants and non-stop partying.
The show’s producers are currently scouting for a house which will serve as the participants’ base, where their every action will be filmed, and have narrowed their choice down to various locations in the south of the island.
Just like the original Jersey Shore, the participants will have to earn their place in the house. The women will work at Get Nailed – Nails by Shanequa, while the men will become employees of Up Your Tail Pipe car tuning garage.
“The government has given the southern area of Malta many precious gifts over the years: the power station, the sewage treatment plant, the airport, fish farms, the Freeport, and Fabrizio Faniello. Bringing a Jersey Shore spin-off to The South reaffirms our commitment to the area.” culture minister Mario de Marco told journalists at a press conference.
The show’s producer, David Knobjockey added, “Dr De Marco was just telling me how places like Bormla and Marsascala would be perfect for the show because they’re full of what you Maltese call ħam…”
“…sandwiches. Ham sandwiches,” the minister interrupted. “Have you ever tasted a ham sandwich from Zabbar? Delicious.”
An advertising campaign for auditions will be conducted on Smash Radio.
“Walking around the Cottonera I’ve already seen like 15 Snooki lookalikes, so finding participants shouldn’t be a problem at all,” Mr Knobjockey said.
When asked if they would be participating, local youths taught inquiring journalists several new strings of expletives before speeding away in their sticker-covered Toyota Starlets.
Labour MP Silvio Parnis has already expressed interest in taking part.
Meanwhile, news that Snooki herself is pregnant has prompted the international community to form a taskforce to locate her nest and destroy the eggs before they hatch.